AN OCEAN IN A DROP

 Darwish says, "  And if happiness should surprise you again, do not mention its previous betrayal.  Enter into the happiness, and burst."  And I add, '' If on a random Friday,  Grief knocks at your door.  Do not abandon him,  welcome him in and nurture him  until he thanks you for acceptance. If you find Anger,  sitting next to you on the couch, do not frown at him. make one extra cup of tea, until he gets up, smiles and says a transient goodbye. If tears stroll down your cheeks, right where there was a lovely smile  only a few moments ago,  Let them flow. Let them flow. Until they cleanse you of your heartbreak." -Anshu Rajput

 "Who am I? Where am I? Where shall I go? Ask yourself these three questions every day." This is the advice I got when I asked someone for advice regarding spirituality. Over time I started asking myself more questions. But one question I ask daily is, "Who am I?". The answer I get is half-cooked, incomplete, and yet better than yesterday.  I am bits and pieces of everyone who touched my life for better or worse. I am the lessons I learned from the mistakes of my mentors. It's almost like I am no longer one person but many in one. I am every book I have ever read, every leaf I have touched. I am also the sensation of sand that I hate so dearly. I am also my fear of letting my thoughts out in the world by writing this.  I am my ability to hold two contradictory thoughts in my head at the same time without going insane. I am my sensitivity that irritates some and fascinates others. What makes a person them? their thoughts? their behaviours? their intentions? their...

 When I was eight and still learning about the ways of this planet, I read somewhere that plants needed a warm and humid environment to grow. Being a smart child with an incredible memory, I remembered it when I saw a tub of hot water. Naturally, my little brain went, "Ooh, this will make my dad's plants grow faster." There I went, ran to my dad's garden with a mug full of scalding hot water and poured it into the nearest plant. My dad, who was watching all this, gasped in total stupor. Unfortunately,  I was too fast to give my old man enough time to respond. (hehe, proud troublemaker smile on my face right now)  While I watched him freak out at my attempted plant murder and ask me what the hell I did, I spoke with my sparkly cheerful eyes, "Papa, I read that plants need a hot and humid environment to grow!" " Budhhu," I heard behind his confused sad face, "Warm! Not hot!" ( He probably regretted sending me to school at this point).  Befo...

 Going to work in public transit is an adventure in itself. In a small city like I live in, you have the sweet privilege of taking the same two buses to work, sitting on the same seats and starting the day with familiar faces of passengers. However, If you are someone like me who sometimes gets late, ( let's say 'sometimes' here.. to make me look good in front of you all) are used to watching the routine break which has the power of either derailing the day or making it even better. On today's episode of Anshu Rajput blabbering her life story, we will hear about one such day.   This week, I missed my second bus. More or less, I saw it leaving in front of my eyes while I ran for it. At times like this, even my Transit card feels abandoned.  Alright, I was prepared with another route which will make me 26 minutes late but hey! At least,  I will make it to the Lab before five! Important information, I have to take one more bus along the way. It's alright! It happen...

 This is the story of a woman who takes a leap of faith and decides to move to a completely unknown city far away from her comfort zone. This is my story. I have recently moved to a city in a French-speaking region of Canada. I should also mention I do not speak French. Yet. ( Editor's Note: This particular piece of information is needed to comprehend the incident the author is about to share with you. Now, you are all buckled up. ;)  I arrived in the city and could not read a thing. Could not read the signboards. Didn't know how to pronounce where I lived. Didn't know how to carry on a conversation after saying Bonjour. I am learning but I still am not quite there yet. Suddenly, I find myself in a world where I can't do one thing that comes naturally to me. I can not read. Is it difficult? Yes. Is it exhilarating? YES. Have I learnt a thing or two from this exciting struggle? YES ( Wish there was a way to write a YES more capital than the previous one.)   I took a t...

I burnt a pan today. Let me correct myself,  I burnt another pan today. But with a difference,  No one mocked  my incompetence, or yelled at me for a burnt pan. The pan and I smiled at each other and a half an hour long ordeal began. A quest to clean it or to come clean to myself. Maybe all this time,  I was looking for a place  where I could burn my pans in peace and call it Home. -Anshu Rajput

For years I have been hearing “ Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder”. Makes me wonder.. Is it my own beauty that I see around me.. or is the world truly this beautiful? Can I take the “me” out of my experience of Life. For once, I would like to observe the cosmos without being the observer. Is my experience of the world tainted because I exist.. or Is it augmented because of the same. If my existence is dissolved into nothingness before I look at them, would the flowers be as beautiful as they are right now? I think, perhaps, even more magnificent. My experience as a human is limited to what I can perceive and what I can not.  What would you observe if you take the observer out of the equation? - Anshu Rajput